The orignal above, and the new one below.



The fuck you to AZ was a nice touch, but I'm seeing a ton of reused footage? Sure it'll all work out on the big screen. Jus sayin' is all.

i dunno who it was who started the whole alternate universe movie posters craze, but i'm more than fine with it as long as they keep being this astoundingly cool.

thanks to ibraheem youssef for cooking these up.

though i am woefully behind on my MST3K viewing, mitchell has yet to be topped.

here's ALL OF IT for those not in the know.

this is the absolute greatest godzilla poster i've ever seen. wrong side of the art is one of the best sites i've been tracking recently, and it never stops getting better.

big fan was a great movie. it just came out on dvd the other day, and you really should see it if you haven't. patton oswalt is shockingly excellent, and i say that having gone into the film knowing he was going to be awesome, yet i was STILL shocked! that's how good he is!

the dvd has some great special features, the highlight of which is patton and writer/director robert siegel chatting with aint it cool news dude capone in chicago for a half hour or so. during the interview, patton confirms that he is the man behind neill cumpston, the absolute greatest movie reviewer ever. you should read every one of his reviews, linked right over here.

on GRINDHOUSE: "not only was it a shotgun full of handjobs exploding in my balls, but also my balls suddenly knew how to make fire using karate. All from seeing GRINDHOUSE, a movie that’s made of screaming car crash zombie boobs."

on X2 (aka X MEN KICKING YOU IN THE BALLS SO HARD THAT YOU PUKE ON YOUR BALLS AND ALSO YOUR ASS): "Remember how the first film had all that Story (= for gays) in the first part, and you were like, “How ‘bout some ass-kicking already?” and then finally they got to it? Not this one. It’s like okay, there’s the credits, and now here’s the ass-kicking and it starts and doesn’t stop and you’re all like, “Pants, meet shit”."

on SIN CITY: "I was thinking that after this movie comes out, they should change the “PAUSE” button on DVD remote controls to read “CARLA GUGINO’S BOOBS”, which would be more accurate."

on DAWN OF THE DEAD: "There’s those three different levels of good movies, you know, where it starts out on: LEVEL ONE: THE RUNDOWN = Taco Bell double-decker tacos. LEVEL TWO: XMEN 2 = That LOST IN TRANSLATION chick eating a double-decker taco slow. LEVEL THREE: DAWN OF THE DEAD (today version) = You eat a Taco Bell double-decker taco and you get to watch a dump truck crash into a Humvee full of jocks, and then the LOST IN TRANSLATION chick runs by naked."

this goes on and on and on and on (AND ON AND ON). if you have watched any movie ever, you more than owe it to yourself to read every word committed to ones and zeroes by this man.

EDIT: whoops! apparently the whole patton/neill connection has been known for a little while now thanks to rolling stone.

above is the trailer for kick-ass, one of my most hotly anticipated films of the coming year. everything i've heard about this makes my toes tingle (so hard! my toes they tingle!) with anticipation. having said that, i'm not sure whether or not i want to know anything about the plot in advance. should i read the comic so as to be able to compare the film to the original material? should i go in completely blind and take the film independent from the comic? it's so complicated...

here's the a fan made trailer for the comic by mark millar & john romita jr

as promised, here's movies of the decade list part deux. the secondest installment. the revenge, if you will.

KISS KISS BANG BANG


like 25th hour, which coincidentally started off yesterdays list, kiss kiss bang bang was something i watched recently after seeing it on a couple of other decade spanning lists, but don't let the newness of my discovering it water down my passion for the film. this was one of the proving ground films where robert downey junior had to show he still had what it took to carry a movie, and he comes out swinging for the fences, as does perpetual oddball val kilmer. if you haven't seen this before, i really recommend you check it out.

LITTLE OTIK


svankmajer!

MAN WHO WASN'T THERE


don't get me wrong, i like no country as much as the next guy, but this just comes down to personal preference. absolutely perfect b&w noir made by two of the best filmmakers out there. also: scarlett johansson.

MY WINNIPEG


what feels like a dreamlike documentary at first, quickly reveals itself to be a masterful work of truly magical fiction. this is a perfectly strange little fantasy world version of winnipeg that manages to feel terrifically genuine in all the right ways.

OLDBOY


a tremendous film here, full of twists and turns that keep you guessing throughout. that yellow hammer scene is unforgettable. if you've seen it you know exactly what's to love about it, and if you haven't then i'm revealing an oldboy sized void in your life that demands to be filled.

PAN'S LABYRINTH


as if you would have guessed it, a "hard r" rated fairy tale but with a child protagonist set in the brutally real world of 1944 fascist spain is such a great playground for del toro's perfectly suited and genuinely amazing visuals.

PUNCH-DRUNK LOVE


though this was the offbeat indie that introduced the world to "dramatic" adam sandler, i can forgive it for leading to all the terds that have come out between this and funny people. like i said above with the coens, this is just a personal preference and arguably there will be blood was indeed a better capital F film, but really it all comes down to flat-out liking this movie so much more than twbb.

ROYAL TENENBAUMS


every time i watch this movie i get closer and closer to tearing up at the end. my chest gets heavier and heavier and i always think "this is gonna be the time..." but i never quite cross that line. wes anderson has been one of my favorite directors since i laid eyes on rushmore, and even though that film's title references a mountain, tenenbaums is so far his peak (ba-zing!).

SCHOOL OF ROCK


when you get a group of talented people together who are obviously passionate about what they are doing, the results are going to be incredible. you can feel the absolute balls out LOVE of rock n roll and the desire to pass that torch on to this current molly coddled (myself included) generation in every frame of film of this movie. each time i watched this thing in the theater i ended up walking around punching the air for about a half hour.

SYNECHDOCE, NEW YORK


this is eternal sunshine taken to the next level. this is charlie kaufman without michel gondry's whimsy to temper him. this is a horror movie where the antagonist is the fact that we all die alone. g'head and disagree (tons of people do), but for my money, this is the best film of the past ten years.

WAKING LIFE


i'm breaking my one director rule for this film, but this and school of rock simply had to be on here. it's something of a shame that kids are gonna go see this film in the future and say "is this a movie or an insurance commercial?" but whatever. like eternal sunshine and synechdoche, ny, this film created a complete environment to roam around in that was perfectly supportive to the narrative.

WALL-E


pixar's masterpeice. period.

WET HOT AMERICAN SUMMER


[[sound of a flower pot breaking]]

today is the first part of my personal films of the decade list. arriving tomorrow will be the second installment. it was a complicated enough sophie's choice sort of scenario getting these all in one place, so i'm not even gonna bother trying to put them in any order from best to least best. you'll get alphabetical and you'll like it, by gum.

25TH HOUR


i'm not gonna get up here and say i saw this thing in theaters or anything. i watched it the other day for the first time, but you can just feel the heart of this thing in each and every scene. at its core, it's spike lee trying to work out his obviously complex feelings about post 9/11 new york, and just fucking nailing it in such a truly personal way.

ALL THE REAL GIRLS


i was really shocked at how much i liked this movie and completely taken by surprise at how well david gordon green was able to present the arc of a romance, from the the endearing idiosyncrasies, to the deep seated insecurities, all strung along with such a subtle sense of humor and lightness.

AMELIE


you've seen this. we all know why this is on here (chicks LOVE it). i think we can move along.

CITY OF GOD


this is the most often rented dvd of the past ten years from the video spot i work at, and i think that's one of the greatest compliments that the city of madison can pay itself.

DARK KNIGHT


the greatest comic book movie of all time, and a flat out perfect action film from start to finish. you know all this. keep scrolling down.

ETERNAL SUNSHINE OF THE SPOTLESS MIND


the ease with which this film seamlessly marries the plot with such astoundingly innovative visual technique is truly incredible. that the result of all this magnifies the emotional intensity of the movie in ways that few other films i've seen have managed to achieve puts it in a league all its own.

FRIDAY NIGHT LIGHTS


i'm a super-secret sucker for sports movies and this is a really, really good one. if you haven't seen it cause you think it's about football, you should check it out cause it's about football... and a dozen other things too that you'll relate to. seriously this is so good. all you artsy fart types shouldn't get so scared of a little testosterone and check it out.

GHOST WORLD


here's a movie that captures the essence of that fleeting growing up moment. if you need real reasons, how about steve buscemi's shoulda-got-a-oscar performance! hey look everyone, let's all meet scarlet johansson! the "that guy's amazing" guy with the nun chucks! maybe the indian song played over the intro credits did it for you. regardless, this is pretty crucial.

GRINDHOUSE (THEATRICAL RELEASE)


why in the fuck is there not a megaa-wesome two disc set of this with ALL THE TRAILERS, awesome packaging, and a coupon to get in free to machete when it hits theaters? the whole value of the thing is in putting the two films together and letting the entirety of the grindhouse experience wash over you.

HIGH FIDELITY


i'm a music nerd. this is a movie about a music nerd who gets to have theoretical sex with catherine zeta jones. also he owns a record store. i don't know which is more of a win. walk into a room with this movie on and try not to watch the remainder of it.

HISTORY OF VIOLENCE


here's some great film making from front to back, with every character fighting for your attention. the only thing this film needs is a some little words on the box that say "academy award winner, best supporting actor, william hurt."

HOT FUZZ


between this and shaun of the dead, i'll always take this. not to poop on shaun of the dead (respect is more than paid), but this is just a slightly better crafted movie. one of the closest things to perfection as we're likely gonna get. until they pop out another flick.

JACKASS


maybe it's because the whole thing gets by on the sheer charisma of johnny knoxville and company, but this and its sequel make me so happy.

KILL BILL (VOLS. 1 & 2)




this one's another no brainer. i won't waste your time telling you how awesome these two movies are. same here as with grindhouse: the hell is wrong with the weinsteins and their dvd releases. why is there not a raging boner of a box set available for me to drop some good money on?

check back tomorrow for the second half of this odyssey through ten years of crap i watched and really liked!

a friend turned me on to doug benson's i love movies podcast.

here's the pitch: doug gets absurdly stoned (he being the guy behind super high me) with dozens of people who are professionally funny, and then they all talk about movies for a half an hour. david cross, patton oswalt, paul scheer, sarah silverman, bob odenkirk, paul f. tompkins, the guy from mtv's singled out...

what are you waiting for? this shit is freeeeeeeeeee!

when paul f. tompkins and sean cullen launch into joe jackson, i fist punched the air. there are good things in this world, and then there are GOOD THINGS! make the right choice people. partake of the comic wonder.